Vegetarian/Vegan Chili recipe

Let's count all the reasons why I am qualified to be a food blogger. I've been thinking of them.

1. I am a decent cook/better baker, admittedly mostly in the "my mom taught me how to do this" mold. Luckily, my mom is also a pretty decent cook.

2. I took a class called "Fandom, Participatory Culture, and Web 2.0" with Henry Jenkins.

3. Many people, both ones I know well and ones I don't, have asked me when I'm going to write "a book." This has been going on for years--the current answer is obviously "after I write this seminar paper, three book reports, this conference abstract, and a dissertation, then if all that gets finished, the book will be an adaptation of my dissertation and you probably won't want to read it anyway."

4. When I was in college, I wrote copy for an SEO marketing company. Most of it was advice: which online college degree is right for you, credit cards for people with bad credit, how to waterproof your basement, travel guides for places I'd never visited, other things I knew nothing about. The moral of the story is you maybe shouldn't trust websites. Also, I learned something about search engine optimization.

5. I used to work as a closed caption editor, and have probably captioned upwards of 40 hours of reality cooking programs.


Let's also count the reasons I am NOT qualified to be a food blogger:

1. I'm a decent cook, but not the most adventurous one. I don't, for instance, frequent fish markets or ethnic food stores (although since I live in L.A., the ethnic food section of my local Ralphs is pretty extensive).

2. Baking is science-y, and so I use recipes for that. Cooking is not all that science-y for me (I am not Wylie Dufresne). I rarely measure anything or write down measurements when I do. I'm a damn good eyeballer. But somehow, I don't think "Hey guys! Look at this awesome pasta sauce I estimated!" is going to make for a very compelling blog.

For instance, look at this tomato cream pasta sauce I estimated earlier this week! It was delicious. Emile the cookie jar approved. And clearly I remembered to take pictures. But I couldn't tell you how to recreate the exact experience.



So I'm going to try to write things down. I found an unused notebook and everything:



And I started writing down how I made what I made for dinner tonight. I give you...


Vegan Chili (or Vegetarian Chili)

Tonight's dinner was brought to you by the letters W, T, and F, and the rest of the phrase, "is in my pantry that I can cook relatively quickly?" It's also based on my mom's chili recipe, which I'm pretty sure isn't written down anywhere.

The answer included this stuff:



(Santa Nelson Mandela magnet is included not because of the World Cup, but because he is awesome.)

Like many other things that taste good, the chili begins with:

1 medium onion, diced
2 cloves garlic, diced
being sauteed in 1 tablespoon olive oil (medium heat)

Then I added:
2 cups water
1/2 cup lentils, rinsed and picked over

Put the lid on the pot at an angle, and simmer on medium heat for about 15 minutes, or until the lentils are tender and have absorbed most of the liquid. Then add:

2 14.5 oz. cans diced tomatoes, undrained (preferably no salt added)
1 can corn, drained (again, preferably no salt added)
1 can kidney beans, rinsed and drained

Season to taste: oh, right, here's where I forgot to measure any of the spices. Well, we can guess.

1 tsp. chili powder - I think I started with this much. Added more later after tasting, again without measuring. I don't like a very spicy chili, mind. I recommend putting in a little, letting it cook for a bit, tasting the brothy part of the chili, and adding more if desired.
1 tbsp. granulated garlic (there is no such thing as too much garlic)
1 tsp. granulated onion
1/2 teaspoon parsley
1/2 teaspoon oregano
Salt and pepper to taste

Reduce heat to low; cover and simmer for about 20 minutes.



It's vegan as-is, and probably fairly good for you. I, of course, am currently eating it with both sour cream and shredded cheddar cheese, which is less good for me.

In my house, the traditional accompaniment for chili is a grilled cheese sandwich. I would also be eating one of those right now...if I had sliced cheese. The chili is pretty good, actually. If you're not a fan of lentils, don't worry. They're actually working as a good meat substitute here - a little extra bite along with the kidney beans, and more satisfying than that time a few months ago when I tried to replace the meat in my chili with cubed firm tofu.

The really nice thing here, though, is how easy it will be to clean up after this. One pot and lid. A can opener. One measuring cup (for the lentils) and one strainer (for the lentils, corn, and kidney beans). One big spoon for stirring/serving and one little spoon for tasting. One knife and cutting board for the onions. One garlic press. One rubber band to put around the bag of lentils. I like easy cleanup.

Edited to add the media pairing: Since the notebook I happened to find is Office branded, I give you Kevin's famous chili from the episode "Casual Friday."